The 5 Keys to Spreading Happiness Across Planet Earth.

The 5 Keys to Spreading Happiness Across Planet Earth.

With Amanda Lindsey and Samia Bano

Looking for that #sparkofhope and joy in life? Want to #spreadpositivity and happiness with #funandease this #thanksgiving?

Listen now to this interview with Amanda Lindsey, Spreader of the #HAPPY and my fellow Happiness Expert! Learn how Amanda helps people find that SPARK of JOY in life and business by helping you get into S.H.A.P.E (Spreading Happiness Across Planet Earth) -- cultivating happiness within, then sharing it with others. :D

-- Delve into "The Five Cs of Happiness" and how embracing these principles can #transformlife, even amidst tough life challenges.

-- Discover how Amanda cultivated happiness from within despite chronic health challenges.

-- Understand the power of curiosity in uncovering what truly brings happiness.

-- Realize how cultivating personal happiness can positively influence others.

-- And so much more!

Connect with Amanda now and check out Amanda's book, “S.H.A.P.E.--Spreading Happiness Across Planet Earth”, at:

https://www.spreaderofthehappy.org/

https://linktr.ee/spreaderofthehappy

https://www.facebook.com/groups/spreading.happiness.across.planet.earth/

To Book your Free HAPPINESS 101 EXPLORATION CALL with Samia, click: https://my.timetrade.com/book/JX9XJ

#MindsetShift #SelfGrowth #PersonalGrowth #EmotionalWellness #InnerPeace #JoyfulLiving #ChronicIllnessSupport #Resilience #SelfDiscovery #LifeCoaching #Wellbeing #PositiveMindset #MentalHealthAwareness #GratitudePractice #ConnectionMatters #CelebrateLife #Curiosity #Collaboration #empoweredliving #changeyourlife #changetheworld #liveyourbestlife

Here's the audio version of this episode:

Full Video Transcript

SAMIA: Hello, Salaam, Shalom, Namaste, Sat Sri Akal, Aloha, Holah, Ciao, Bonjour, Buna, Privet, Mabuhay, and Dzień Dobry! It's really, really good to be with you again. And I know you'll be so happy you've joined us today because guess what? You have not just one happiness expert with you today, but two. Because today we are joined by Amanda Lindsey, who is the spreader of the happy. And I'm so happy to have you with us, Amanda. Welcome…

AMANDA: Thank you. Thank you so much, Samia. I'm happy to be here. Excited and thrilled. I love what you do and I'm so thankful to be part of the show tonight, so or today, wherever you are. So thank you so much.

SAMIA: You're so welcome. And Amanda, please tell us more about who you are and what you do...

AMANDA: All right, so yes, I am spreader of the happy. I am also a speaker and an author. I just wrote my first book and launched it called “Let's Get Into Shape. Spreading Happiness Across Planet Earth.”

SAMIA: I love it. And this is your first solo book. You're part of other multi author books as well.

AMANDA: Yes. And so, I've done three other multi-authored books and they all have all the chapters that I've contributed have to do with happiness in some way. So I call them the Happiness Chronicles. But I decided, you know, after doing the three, I was like, I think I'm ready. I'm ready to go out there and spread my message solo time. So that's what I did.

SAMIA: That is so awesome. That is awesome. And I was reading a little bit about your philosophy and your book and what it's all about. Tell us more. So you use this acronym of shape. You talk... I mean, it's actually in the title of your book, Let's Get Into Shape. But it's not shape the word, but shape the acronym. Tell us more. What's it about?

AMANDA: Yes, it stands for "Spreading Happiness Across Planet Earth". And you know, I liken it to getting into physical shape because, you know, we've got happiness muscles and the more we work our happy muscles, the stronger they get. Just like when you work your other muscles and you build up and you get into shape. So that's how kind of, sort of how it came about. But yeah, it's a mindset. It's a unique way of looking at happiness. First it's looking at it from the lens of yourself and then looking at it from the lens of other people. So symbolically or you know, it's cultivating happiness within and then sharing it with others.

SAMIA: Yeah, I actually really, really appreciate that because this is like one of the big lessons that I've learned in my own journey of cultivating happiness, living happiness, is that you do have to start with yourself in many ways. And it's not enough to just care about yourself and stay focused on yourself. You kind of have to like sort of widen your circle of care and concern in order to continue to be able to grow happier and in order to be as happy as you can be.

AMANDA: I agree completely. And you know, it's like it grows when you give it away. You know how a lot of times people, people like to keep the things that they have because, you know, they're afraid of losing it. But this is… Happiness is one of those things, first of all, you know, it's absolutely free and it's an unlimited supply, but it just keeps getting bigger and bigger the more that you share it and give it away.

SAMIA: True, true, true. So I know that you share like a bit of a framework in your book and in other context where you teach, there's like the five C's of getting into shape. Tell me a little bit more about that.

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AMANDA: Well, first of all, getting into shape is a unique practice because, you know, there's 8 billion people in the world, and so there's really no one way of doing it because everyone expresses happiness, they feel happiness, what brings them joy, all different. And so it's limitless possibilities right there to how to get into shape. But the five C's kind of generally will, I guess, explain how to go about. It's a guide. There we go. The five C's are how I guide you on the journey into getting into shape. And so how you do it specifically, that's of course up to you because it's your happiness adventure. But the five C's are there for guidance and they are curiosity, connection, cooperation, collaboration and celebration.

SAMIA: Ah, you'll have to tell me more about each of the five C's. Tell me a little bit more about curiosity. Why at the starting point and why is that so important for happiness?

AMANDA: Well, for me and I would suggest for everyone is, you know, just to get curious and ask the questions. And it's not just about asking, you know, am I happy? Because a lot of times that's what people ask and then they just kind of leave it there and they stop it. They're like, yes, I'm happy or no, I'm not. And that they, you know, that could be. I guess they think that's the end of the happiness journey, but it's actually just the beginning because when you go deep down, it's bringing, you know, it's asking those questions what, you know, first of all, going inward and asking yourself, you know, what do I desire? What are my goals? What brings a smile to my face? And then once you get kind of, you know, the general idea there, you move on to the people around you. And, you know, a lot of the times we don't, we don't ask them. We don't ask other people, you know, are you happy or what makes you happy?

SAMIA: Yeah. Isn't that remarkable? I mean, it's really remarkable. You just made me think about the fact that, you know, positive psychology, which is a self field within psychology that's focused on studying happiness, on focused on studying the positive emotions, the positive characteristics that people have. So, you know, it's like literally the science of happiness or the study of the psychology of happiness. It was not recognized and as an official subfield within psychology until like 1999.

AMANDA: Wow.

SAMIA: Yeah. I mean, before 1999, psychology was the dominant framework, was clinical psychology, you know, and clinical psychology, as the word indicates, is like about figuring out what's wrong with people, like diagnosing you with you, you know, diagnosing diseases in you, like illness in you, like, what's wrong with you. And so it's like such a different mindset than asking the question of, hey, what's right with people?

AMANDA: What's right with you? You know? You know, I think about that too. You know, it's almost like sometimes, you know, in greeting people, you know, you say, "Hey, how's it going?" And I, I like to, I like to almost state to, when I see somebody say, hey, what's good with you? Because you're kind of, you're kind of prompting a positive response where, you know, if you can say, if you just leave it wide open, you know, hey, how's it going? Oh, people can start listing all the things that are hurting them, all the thing, you know, all the things that, like you said that are wrong. But if, you know, if you're kind of prompted to answer in a positive way, it gets you to start thinking more positively. And that's always, I find when you, when you start that process of thinking, like the curiosity that's what keeps it, that's what gets it going. And it's so important. Another, you know, another reason too, why I find we don't ask ourselves if we're happy or ask other people is because we're either afraid of the answer or we don't want to know.

SAMIA: Yeah. Yeah. And if you do know, it's like, do you know what to do if the answer is not what you want it to be? And I think for a lot of people that the thing that shuts them off or that they want to avoid, it's like there's nothing I could do about it. So let's not go there.

AMANDA: Right. No, I completely understand. And that's one of the things that I try to talk about in my book because the rest of the title is 52 Happy Hints to turn your frown upside down. And basically it's a journey, a year long journey that I've written it kind of for to focus on like one hint a week. And it, like, you know, it's little things that again, prompt you to get that curiosity and get the happiness ball rolling.

SAMIA: Yeah, yeah. No, I really appreciate the curiosity that, you know, you're introducing into how we get to be happy because, yeah, a lot of times, like, I know, like for me in my days when I was not happy, like, literally a lot of it did have to do with my not knowing what I needed to know in order to be able to help myself be more happy. And so I had to get curious about, okay, well, what's out there? What's the learning? What are the answers out there that people have, that they have been using to help themselves be happy? And so it really, like for me, the journey of empowering myself to take control of my happiness did in fact start with getting curious.

AMANDA: That's it, that's what it did for me as well. Because honestly, for me, I've been managing chronic health issues since I was 15 years old. And at my worst, you know, I was bedridden, couldn't move at all, and fatigued so bad, and things were just, you know, crumbling around me. And you know, there really wasn't anything physically that brought me joy because my body was in pain, you know, 24/7. And so it really it was trying to go inward, but outward, if that makes sense, you know, I know.

SAMIA: Actually, tell me more about that.

AMANDA: Well, the curiosity aspect, you know. It was kind of like learning about a new friend all over, you know, reintroducing myself to sparks of joy. Because, you know what? When you're in complete utter pain and exhaustion, you really are focusing on the outward, and there's really not much to be happy about. And so to be able to get that joy back, you know, I was. I just kind of was getting sick of being sick and tired of being sick and tired, if that makes sense, you know?

SAMIA: Yeah, no, that I can relate to.

AMANDA: And so, yeah, it was really just. It was. It was kind of an overwhelming start. But, you know, little bits at a time, I would, you know, just notice things that, you know, brought smiles to my face every once in a while. And I focus on that, and then those things seem to start being easier to find.

SAMIA: Yeah. You know, you made me think about, like, you know, we all create these stories in our minds about our own experiences, about our past and our history. And I had made up this story about my history and my past that, well, I'm a survivor of child sexual abuse. So, of course, as a result of that, I experienced deep trauma. And there's no denying that or making light of that. And at the same time, you know, for a long... Like when I started to, you know, make the, tell the story of, you know, what my experience was in the aftermath of experiencing that trauma, you know, I... One of the things that I would talk about is how I forgot to smile. I lost all my friends. And it's absolutely true. That did happen. I literally. Other than my brother and my sister and my cousins that, you know, I lived with because we lived as part of a joint family system, I lost every single friend that I had. I was known to be, like, somebody who... Or rather, I became known to be somebody who was antisocial, didn't like going out. You know, I dressed deliberately in horrible clothes. And my mom would actually. The one of the few things that my mom got mad at me and fought with me about was she wanted me to dress better, and I just refused to dress in any kind of way that, like, I didn't want anyone paying any attention to my body. I didn't want to look attractive. I didn't want to look nice, you know, and so I would literally fight with my mom to wear my drab, baggy old clothes, like, that kind of thing. So there's no. There's definite truth to that, but I forgot that even through that really tough period, there were times when I was joyful and when I managed to be happy. And I was reminded of that when one day there's this old photo album that surfaced from somewhere, and it had this picture of me laughing, like, and rolling. Like I was rolling down a sand dune with my sister. And I was like, I had forgotten that memory. Like, I had forgotten experiencing that until I saw that picture. And I was like, wait, I'm smiling here. I'm laughing here. And I must have been having fun rolling down that sand dune. And I just blocked it off in my mind because the story I'd made up was so focused on the trauma and the suffering and the hard times that I had experienced. So it was like such a good reminder that, oh, no, even through the tough times, we can find moments of happiness, and then hopefully we can learn to capitalize on them and build on them and get back to our happy place sooner than later.

AMANDA: And I find too. That's beautiful reminder that, you know. If you find yourself in a really tough spot, but you. And you lose hope per se. If you see, if you see that, like a picture of yourself smiling or, you know, if somebody brings up a memory where, you know, you shared joy, you see it, and hopefully, hopefully you can realize that you can get back there, you know, if you've seen it, if you've done it once, you can get back to that place, you know.

SAMIA: Yeah, true, true. So once you get curious and you start, you know, learning about, okay, what makes me happy, what makes other people happy, and so forth, where does... When does the second C come in? I think that's connection, you said, right?

AMANDA: Yes, connection.

SAMIA: Tell me more about that...

AMANDA: Connection's all about relationships. It's relationships, again, with yourself starting and then relationships with those around you. And, you know, the curiosity builds into the. Because as you're asking yourself these questions and asking others these questions, you can't help but start building relationships with yourself and with others. And so that connection starts to form because of that curiosity. And the more connected you start becoming, the easier it is to be happy and to spread it with other people.

SAMIA: Yes. Oh, my gosh, that is so true. Curiosity leading so naturally to connection, including with yourself. That is such a... Tell me a little bit more about your experience with deepening your connection with you. How, like, what was that like?

AMANDA: Okay. Yeah. So again, with my health conditions, I had pretty much gotten to a point where I lost connection to myself and to humanity. You know, I was just kind of lost everywhere. And for me, what kind of brought me into more connection with myself was seeing there were some very special individuals who kept showing up for me with the symbolic hugs and smiles because at the point, I couldn't be touched. So hugs, real hugs, were not available. But, you know, just having those people show up and keep having those hugs and smiles for me didn't matter what, you know, mood I was in. It didn't matter how I was treating them. It didn't matter how what version of me showed up at all. They were always there. And seeing that kind of made me realize and brought me to the place where I started to show up and show up for myself. And so that was the initial, like, connection part, was just those hugs and smiles, you know? Yeah.

SAMIA: Wow. You just made me think of my sister and my mom, but my sister. But I mean, my mom... It's like the difference between my mom and my sister is obviously mom is mom and sister, sister. Like, with my mom, she has always been such a loving presence in my life and been such a, you know, always there to hug me, love me, kiss me, whatever, feed me, whatever I needed. You know, she's there. But, you know, because she was my mom, I felt a certain sense of restraint in terms of, like, you know, especially, like, coming from my culture, you know, Indian, Pakistani, traditional culture, you know, when you're dealing with your elders, you have to maintain a certain level of respect. It's not okay to scream and shout at your parents or order them around or, you know, that kind of thing. And so I always felt a certain restraint with my mom, even though, like, her goal has always been to be an unconditionally loving presence in my life. But with my sister, especially, because she was my little sister, she was one of the only people in my life that I felt very unrestrained around because, like, as an older sister, I have status, like, more status than she does in our culture. And so I actually use that. You know, I use that position. But the way, like, in my days of when I was, like, really traumatized. So the thing is, like, my sister very much my mom very much like, my mom is a very, very loving person. She is, like, heart of gold. She's, like, exceptionally compassionate. Even since she had. She was like a little kid. Like, you could see these qualities about her. And so she was the other person in my life besides my mom, who was, like, constantly trying to always be present with me and for me in a unconditionally loving way. But with her, I felt more free to, like, if I was not in such a good mood, which was often because, you know, I would feel free to, like, push her away, for example. But she kept coming back. And I mean, I don't know if I would have... If I had been in her situation, I don't know if I would have had the patience, I don't know if I would have had the compassion or the empathy to keep going back to someone who kept pushing me away. But the fact that my sister did that for me, I mean, it's absolutely to change my life as well. And it did help me connect with myself also. I mean, just earlier actually today, I was talking to somebody else and I was sharing with them how, like, my sister was one of the very first people with whom, when I was in a place where I was like, okay, I want to start improving myself. I want to start improving my relationships. She was one of the first people that I felt free enough to do that with, like, try it out. And I was like, okay, this here's the real truth. Because I not told anyone in my family about the abuse I went through. So she was actually the first person in my family that I told. And I was like, okay, and this is why I've been so distant and obnoxious even, and. But I want to change that, and can you help me out? And, you know, so sometimes, you know, I may still be rough, but I want to get better and please help me out. And of course she said, yes, I will do everything I can to help you. And it just, yeah, changed my life for sure.

AMANDA: That's so amazing, you know, and right there, it demonstrates that that connection with yourself then builds on to the connection with other people.

SAMIA: Yeah.

AMANDA Because you can trust and, you know, and for me, the connection with other people really kind of really started through a pretty, Pretty tough time for everyone in the world. It was during the pandemic. I started to see the similarities between what was happening in the pandemic and what was happening with my physical and, you know, with me, with my conditions, you know, isolation, anxiety, fear of the unknown, immobility. Now, granted, my immobility was, you know, restrained to a bed, but, you know, because of physical reasons, but, you know, limited mobility, people were, you know, confined to their homes and, you know, financial insecurity. And I just, I realized I was like, oh, my God, you know what? It doesn't matter who you are, you know, how much money you have, you know, where you live. We're all connected through pain and suffering. That was what my first connection, you know, I was like, oh, my God. You know, and that's when I kind of. I touched humanity again, if you will. You know what I'm saying?

SAMIA: Yeah.

AMANDA And when I... You know, when I realized that I was so bittersweet because I was like, oh, my goodness. I'm finally am relating to people again. This is great. And then I'm like, oh, my God, this is how I'm relating to people. I don't want that. And so that's where, you know, shape came about, because I was like, you know, I want my relationships, and I want my connection to people to be one of happiness and hope and joy and positivity, and so that's where spreading happiness across planet Earth. I was like, that's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna make every encounter that I have as meaningful and as joyful as possible.

SAMIA: Oh, I love that. I love that. And it's amazing that, you know, you had that realization. Wow. You know, to... I mean, there is, like, when you find that common ground with others who are may be suffering in similar ways. I mean, on the one hand, that is such an amazing experience because you're like, oh, I'm not alone. I'm not the only one, you know, who's going through difficult time. And in some ways, that's, like, really validating and reassuring, and it can be very tempting to just kind of stay there, you know, like, and just have. It's like, you know that saying, misery loves company.

AMANDA Yes.

SAMIA: The fact that you didn't just stay there and you thought, oh, you know what? I want to be the spreader of happiness. I want to relate to others in a more happy way. That is so amazing. That is so amazing.

AMANDA Thank you. I called it my happiness awakening, where, you know, most people have a spiritual awakening. I had a happiness awakening.

SAMIA: That's amazing. Yeah, because, you know, it's like a real thing. You also just made me think about that analogy. I don't know if it's actually a real thing, but people talk about, you know, like, if you have a bucket of crabs, the crabs that are further down will literally pull the crabs that are further up. They'll pull them down the bucket. So none of the crabs are able to escape the bucket because they keep pulling each other down. And it's sort of like, you know, going back to that mindset of misery, love, company that where, you know, people get into this mindset of, well, if I can be happy, if I can't have this, if I can't have that, then, you know, I'm not going to... And you see someone else who has what you would love to have instead of being like, okay, well how can I get that? You, you're like, no, I bring this person down instead. So that's like, it's like a real phenomena of human psychology that, you know, people can get caught up in. So for sure we can't take for granted, you know, this other realization of, no, you know what? No, let's not do that to each other. Let's actually support each other and let's actually help each other be more happy.

AMANDA Oh my goodness. That, that right there, that is perfect to leading to the next C's. I kid you not. You, are a mind reader. Because it's actually cooperation and collaboration.

SAMIA: Yeah. Tell me more about those...

AMANDA And basically, it's like you, like the crabs, it's working towards. It's working with each other and it's working with yourself instead of like the crabs working against each other and working against yourself. And I don't know about you, but for me in the past, I was the biggest obstacle to my own happiness, you know, and so working, working with myself, I found it. It's so much easier to be happy than when I, you know, would put myself in the middle and stop, basically, you know, sabotage my own happiness, you know.

SAMIA: Can you share an example of what that looks like when you sabotaged your own happiness?

AMANDA: Oh, man... Let's see. Gotta think a minute. Guess that like, you know, right off the top of my head has to do with one of the jobs that I applied for or, you know. It was when I was working for coffee shop, believe it or not. So I was a barista and there was always times when the, you know, assistant manager position would, would pop up and I would apply and I would not get the job. And so I was like, okay, well, keep going. You know, it would a couple of cycles, you know, and still no go, but I'm still applying. Well when I get the job, because I do. Finally I applied and I Get the. I get the job and I go and I start and I just, you know, I'm like, I really wasn't. Well, okay. First of all, I wasn't really sure if I wanted it. I had the interview and they offered it to me. I wasn't really sure if I wanted it because when they kind of told me what it was going to entail, I was like, I don't know if that's me or not. Right. But I looked in the past and was like, you know, I kept getting looked over every time I did this, so I'm going to do it because what if I never get this chance again? What if this is it? You know, this is my last hope. And so I took it and knowing, knowing, really knowing full well it wasn't for me. But the whole reason I did it was, I guess, to. I really don't know why, but it definitely increased my stress. You know, it was absolutely everything I hated, and yet I did it anyway. And I knew it deep down, but I guess I was trying to prove to myself something I don't really know. But again, putting myself in a position that I know. Won't make me happy and I don't know why I did it. And that's another, you know, positive psychology I get, or, you know, psychology thing to think about with regarding, you know, some things I can get curious about for sure. But again, I just get in my own way.

SAMIA: Yeah, and I hear you on that. I mean, and I'm just guessing that part of that may just have been that you were following the societal formula for what you're supposed to do. It's like, okay, you get a job at a certain level and then you're supposed to try and get to the next level up and whatever the positions are in that organizational context. And for you, that meant a assistant manager. And then, and then once you're assistant manager, it's like, okay, now let's aim for manager. And then, you know, whatever comes after that. And that's just part of what we are told we're supposed to do. So...

AMANDA: Yeah, and. And it's real easy to get caught up in that.

SAMIA: Yeah. Yeah, but it's, you're so right. It's. I mean, if our happiness is going to be our priority, we can't let ourselves get sucked into following these kinds of generalized formulas for how you're supposed to live your life. Because, I mean, I'm sure they work great for some people, but there's no way that one way of doing things can work for all of us, given the diversity of our humanity and our needs and our very different characters and all of that. And so it's like, you know, we have to, we have to follow our own path. And at least in some things, I mean, I'm sure in some cases following the society's established pathways will work out just fine, but at least in some contexts, they won't. And so it's like, yeah, let's really listen to our inner voices that are telling us, hey, this is not for me.

AMANDA: And, you know, thinking about it more, more and more now, it's being scared.

SAMIA: Yeah.

AMANDA: And, you know, scared to maybe I would, you know, I was scared to truly be happy or scared to, you know, if I don't do all this, you know, if I don't do what I said I always wanted to do, you know, what do I do next, kind of. Or where am I, you know?

SAMIA: Right, right. A little bit of the fear of the unknown, I suppose, creeping in. It's like as long as you are following a supposed to be proven pathway to success, if not happiness, then at least you're like, okay, at least I know I'm doing some version of the right thing. But if you have to, like, give that up and figure out your own way, then it's like, oh, my gosh.

AMANDA: What's very interesting is, you know, when it all came to be that point where, you know, I didn't have any job anymore, I didn't have anything, and all there was was to find out who I was and what made me happy. It really was so much fun.

SAMIA: Yeah.

AMANDA: And I had, I had the best time, you know, and I continue to find. I continue to have an amazing time finding out what brings me happiness and would, you know, it's that evolution. So I think, you know, if you are scared, you know, it goes back to that curiosity. It really does.

SAMIA: Yes. I love it. I love it. Now, you had mentioned that two of the Cs were cooperation and collaboration. What's the, what's the distinction for you between cooperation and collaboration?

AMANDA: Well, they both are all about inspired action towards your happiness, taking steps towards happiness in general. But cooperation is focusing individually on individualized goals and desires. Whether it's you as an individual or like your team members as an individual or like your clients or your friends. It's all just the. It's an individualized working together towards individualized goals and desires to bring happy, to bring about happiness where in collaboration, it's about shared goals and desires and shared happiness. And so we're all working together in both of them, but one of them is individual goals and the other one is shared.

SAMIA: Yes. Okay. Okay. You know, that is a brilliant distinction and very wise that, you know, you have incorporated both of those elements because like we were saying before, it's like, while it is absolutely essential for us to work on our own self and our individual happiness is just not enough. So we really need both. We need to be working on our own stuff, but also then be part of something bigger that's like going beyond us. So I love that you have that in how you are approaching spreading happiness. That's amazing. So tell me more about the last C...

AMANDA: Yes, it is the last C. But it is not the least important for sure. It is celebration. And actually that's, it's, to me, that's one of the most overlooked parts of happiness because. And, and I guess too, you know, we'll go with the work situation. You know, in societies, hierarchies, you know, you have this particular position and then it's expected that you strive for the next one and then you strive for the next one. Well, when do you get to enjoy any of it, you know, and that's really what celebration is all about. It's being grateful and it's being appreciative for every little win on the way to making those goals happen or making those desires, you know, come to fruition. Because it's all about the journey, you know.

SAMIA: Yeah. Yes, I agree with you. The celebration, it's like an expression of joy. So it's like sort of like one way I think about it is, you know, like most of the time, like, my goal is to be like in a peaceful, calm kind of energy, because that's sustainable, you know, but it's like there's more to life than just always being peaceful and calm. Like there's, you can mean even higher energy states like joy and celebration. Oftentimes joy and celebration go really well together. The celebration in terms of like, you know, the one stimulates the other. And so it's like, with joy, though, I just find that because it's such a high vibration, like, I don't, I'm not always able to maintain a high level of joy all the time. So I'm like, okay, I'll slip back down to peace. But I do love being joyful as much as I can.

AMANDA: Oh, yeah. And for me, I'm going to be honest, happiness is my. My expression of love. So whatever word I don't, I don't get hooked on, I guess the words, because I know that. I know a lot of people have, like you said with. You have a very distinct definition of what joy is for you. And it's different than calm and peace and happiness. And for me, if that word and feeling is the same as how you feel about love, that's that for me, it's all the same. And, you know, so... And again, like, you know, there are different levels to it.

SAMIA: Yeah.

AMANDA: And it's not necessarily, you know, it's. It's the same for me. It's the same entity. It's the same experience. It's just different levels of it, you know.

SAMIA: Yes, yes, I agree with you on that. I mean, I think one of the reasons why I make the distinction that I do between the words is actually to recognize that there are different levels, you know, because, like, in terms of our experience of happiness, like, one of the most beautiful lessons that I've been learning is that our capacity to feel happy and, or whatever other word you want to use for the this kind of really loving, positive emotional state is that there's like, you know, it's. There's like so much depth to, to that experience, and you can keep going deeper and deeper in the experience. And actually our capacity to the, to experience these things is actually infinite. You know, in terms of, like, you could keep going deeper, deeper or bigger and bigger and, or, you know, like, like whatever the analogy would be that you would want to use. But it's like you can literally be always expanding and growing bigger or going deeper in your experience of these positive states. And so it's sort of like sometimes our language is very limiting, and so to be like, okay, you know what? We'll try and use some different words to explain or to express this idea that we can go even deeper and even deeper in that experience.

AMANDA: And it's amazing. You know, I know like in certain languages, you know, there are very specific words for different types of love. You know, where then like in English, you know, it's just... It's love. And, and again, you know, there, there are so many different levels to it. And so, you know, I think it's amazing to have as many words as possible to describe the same thing, you know.

SAMIA: Yeah. And I actually really loved what you said about like when you're talking about happiness, it's really an expression of love. That is such a amazingly profound way of understanding what happiness is all about. Because you know, for sure that's also... I think that is a realization that I've come to more recently that connection between happiness and love. And like, for me I came at it from a more like spiritual perspective of realizing that ah, you know, whenever I'm feeling happy, it's because I am able to realize that I'm being loved like at a spiritual level. You know, like as in God, our Divine, the Divine, our True Source. Whatever name you want to give our Source. You know, it's a loving, it's a loving like it's a loving connection, it's a loving energy and it's always there, you know, loving us and taking care of us. And actually when, when we are feeling happy, it's just an expression of that love that we are receiving, that care that we are receiving. And so we are just sort of like channeling it when we are being happy or when we are experiencing happiness. And so it's, and that is such a, it's been such a wonderful realization for me because to be happy because you're being loved is like such a wonderful, beautiful reason to be happy.

AMANDA: Absolutely. And what's very interesting to you, one of my, one of my multi-author books, it was called Divine Love and my chapter, it was called Cadillac of Wheelchairs. Oh no, sorry. Finding the Happy and the Crappy: The Cadillac of Wheelchairs and realizing my source of joy and what it came to, what came to me, what I came to realize, it's just like you're experience or you were explaining is that you know, that happiness, that happiness is me and I am love, I am happiness and wherever I go, it goes. And so it's, it was a very spiritual thing for me to discover that as well. And it was. You know, because a lot of the times we look outward for happiness and yeah, you know, it can sustain you for a while for sure. But eventually, you know, the what's going to be your true source? Your true source of happiness is inside.

SAMIA: Yeah, yeah. Not only the more true source, but also the more sustainable source. And also the source that like if you are interested in being in control of your happiness to the extend. Any of us can be in control of our happiness. You know, it's when our happiness is sourced from the inside that, you know, because the outer reasons for happiness, the outer stimuli, any of it, no, no matter how precious it is for us. But any of those sources can just go away. Like whether it's a person that you love so much and who loves you so much, there are a million different reasons they could leave your life. If it's any object, if it's any environment, it could be taken away from you. Some accident of nature or some disaster like an earthquake would come and literally like, you know.

AMANDA: Right.

SAMIA: Swallow up whatever that thing is that you thought are, that, you know, made you happy to have in your life. And so all of these things you can lose like in an instant and not be able to get them back possibly, potentially. And so it's not a very, I mean, if that's what you depend on for your happiness, you're kind of going to struggle in your life.

AMANDA: Yeah, a little bit. A little bit. And you know, again, I've experienced that and it definitely looking back, it was a struggle. And when you realize that it's inside and that it is a choice. I feel that, you know, regardless of what's going on around you, you can choose to still be happy because, because it's inward, it's that source of love. And you know, it's not to say that the things around you, you know, are not, it's not to bypass anything, trust me. It's not to say, you know, la la la, life is good when it's not. It's just choosing to focus on things that are more positive than what's going on around your life. And you know, for me, an experience with that. It was when I couldn't move at all. I had, you know, really, really no place to go. You know, at one point I was only able to really to move my eyes. And so like, you know, I would, I would go inward, I'd use my imagination and I would focus on somewhere else I went. I had my happy place in my imagination and it was a beautiful field of flowers. And you know, so yeah, around me things were, things sucked. I'm not gonna lie. That's point blank. That's how it was. And, but I was able to, I was able to find the happy in the crappy and that happiness was going in and you know, smelling those flowers, looking at all the pretty colors and, you know, being there in my imagination because nobody can take that away. That's always with me, you know?

SAMIA: Yeah. Amanda, thank you so much for sharing that. And I want to keep asking you more questions and talking with you, and I'm looking at the time, and I'm like, oh, man. I think it's around the time we need to start wrapping up for today. Do you have any last thoughts you would like to share?

AMANDA: Well, I would just like to say that I'm celebrating that we had this beautiful conversation. And thank you so much. Thank your audience because, you know, Shape is so special to me. It's my mission, my passion and purpose. And so to be able to share it with you guys, that just lights me up. So thank you...

SAMIA: Thank you, Amanda. And for my last reminder, I will just remind our listeners to please make sure you check the show notes because we will be dropping Amanda's links in there so you can connect with her and continue to learn with her and support her mission to spread the happy. That is such a wonderful mission. And yeah, until we connect next time, I just wish you lots and lots of peace and joy… :)