SAMIA: Hello, Salaam, Shalom, Namaste, Sat Sri Akal, Aloha, Holah, Ciao, Bonjour, Buna, and Privet!It's really really good to be with you again... And I'm very happy that you are joining us today because we have a very awesome, awesome guest... And it's Farah Asif, who is a Personal Branding Expert. And I'm so excited about what we'll be learning with you today Farah…welcome.

FARAH: Thank you. Thank you so much, Samia... It's a pleasure to be here with all of you...

SAMIA: And Farah I'll ask you to jump right in by telling us a little bit more about who you are and what you do...

FARAH: Sure, okay... So I'm Farah Asif and I work with entrepreneurs, with coaches and healers... to help them to build their online presence and to get their real authentic selves out there online. Because there's a lot of like preconceived notion about how you have to show up online and people have gotten very, very insecure... There's a lot of comparison paralysis, there's a lot of... there's a lot of fear of visibility, frankly... fear of judgment, fear of, you know… there's just a lot of traumas as well. So I help coaches and healers overcome their blocks as well, and show up in a really authentic way that feels good to them. And it's been such a pleasure doing this...

SAMIA: I love it! And you're doing such important work because when we're talking about coaches and healers... I mean, you being a personal branding expert, you know, how critical it is for us to develop a personal brand because, I mean, we are in a profession where our personal brand... I mean, that's the face...

FARAH: Yes...

SAMIA: …of our business, right. Like we are the face of our business, we are the voice of our business... Tell me more about what is like for you a key component or a key strategy or aspect of building out the personal brand.

FARAH: So key component... that's a really good question Samia because there's… there's a lot of things I could tell you… but let me just hone in on like, what would... where would be a starting point… would be... first of all, you need to choose the platform that you feel really good posting on... I think that's the number one thing that a lot of people end up posting on multiple platforms when they start, and there's so much overwhelm… and you just need to see how what I like to tell my clients is like, which platform do you like to spend the most time on, you know… that's where you actually want to be posting, because you also enjoy the experience... and social media can be such a time suck. And as entrepreneurs, we have like a million things and also we have lives... hello, like we're, we're also moms, we have our social life and everything like that. And we have families… and so you want to be really mindful of not letting social media take over your life, even as like you're building your business. So choose your platform, that would be the first place I would start…

SAMIA: Wohoo I love that. I love that. And I… that was probably one of the most important advices that I got from my coach when I started working... 

FARAH: That's great...

SAMIA: … because I did drive myself crazy trying to...

FARAH: ..exactly...

SAMIA: Oh my gosh, because the… this... I just want our listeners to know that this is not advice to be taken for granted in the sense that there are other people, other experts who will tell you no, you have to have at least the big four... That was another bit of advice that I had received to really get… at that time the Big Four were Twitter, Facebook, YouTube, Google...

FARAH: Oh my gosh… yeah...

SAMIA: ...and so we're like you have to have at least this job for profiles, and you need to manage them and you need to post on them because if you don't exist on all of these platforms it’s like you don't exist... And that was the first advice I heard so I tried to follow it got me really overwhelmed…

FARAH: Yeah...

SAMIA: And... thank God... 

FARAH: Yes... I mean... 

SAMIA: ...I got a different bit of advice…

FARAH: You found the way out… but yeah no... I think a lot of people have heard… and the thing is, there's a lot of... it's… I call it bro mar... bro marketing, which is something I like… I work with a lot of female entrepreneurs as well, and our female energy... a lot of my clients are also empaths. And they're quite intuitive, and they're sensitive to energy... And so you have to really put your energy... how do you say it… what is the word for that? Like... when you're conscious of where you put your energy... And if you're, like, spreading yourself so thin and like trying to build up an online presence all at once, and also you're learning how, right… like you're learning what type of content goes on Twitter, or where... Google, and then it's way, way, way too much... So…

SAMIA: That's right... I think what I realized was that the first advice that I got about you have to post everywhere, it wasn’t really like bad advice in itself. But it's, you have to recognize in what context it is good… and you just beautifully contextualized for me that, you know, if you're just starting out, for example, if you are like still a small operation in terms of if it's just you or you have a very small team... It you know… this advice of both to everywhere, and both everyday everywhere, you know, that kind of thing is really gearing more towards like, bigger companies who have entire teams dedicated just to the marketing aspect of businesses, you know… and so they have the time and capacity to do that. But if we are solopreneurs then we don't have that capacity... So okay, so that brings me to my next question, and that is… when we think about what we can do really well as coaches, healers... I know one of the things that you are really amazing at Farah, and that I really have appreciated since I've been following you on social media and so forth… is sharing your story... Can you tell me more about how that... Yeah, what that's about for you, and how you use that...

FARAH: Absolutely. So I work a lot with storytelling… and the power of stories is because as coaches and as personal brands, we represent our experience. And generally, we take from our experience to coach… and we are experts of our experience… let's just call it that, right... And from that we have, we have become coaches in whichever field we are in. And the thing about storytelling is that it's a way to connect directly with someone because even if someone has not lived the same thing, people have similar experiences... and through  stories we can actually connect much deeper with a human being… because there's more vulnerability there, there's more humaneness, there is you know, there's just simply more connection... And people are frankly, we're obsessed with stories. That's where, like why we love series... That's why we love movies... That's why we love books, right. And because all of these are just stories. And so why would it be different at all for personal brands and for social media? I mean, why do you follow someone... like think about someone you really, really love on social media... I bet you that you know a little bit more about them than just what they do on a surface level. They have let you in to their life, their experience… and that's why you start to like them, trust them, because you have a sense of a rapport... 

SAMIA: Yeah…

FARAH: Does that make sense?

SAMIA: Indeed. That's... in fact, you just made me think about… I watch a lot of these late-night shows like Trevor Noah and Stephen Colbert, etc... They are US shows… and they're doing a sketch on how they're all these... Oh no, wait, I think it was John Oliver who was doing a sketch on the... on how these big corporations on social media… they try so hard to build some kind of a personality for themselves, you know, and like they… because it's like just a corporate brand is not going to inspire anyone to want to work with them or consume their products or services…

FARAH: …it is such an advantage... it is such an advantage we naturally have as people who our... who are selling... who are also selling our business… like we have that natural advantage that we can inspire, we can connect, we can... yeah, so beautiful…

SAMIA: Yeah, when we think about sharing our stories... What's like a challenge that people can face in that context?

FARAH: How to connect that to what they do, right? Like because of course, you are businesses… so you don't want to be just like rattling on about something that like is not related at all... So I totally, I totally can respect that. And also, people are wondering how much they should share, like, what are the boundaries around… what's appropriate to share and what they shouldn't? And so let me just break this down... So how much should you share? First of all, that is really, really dependent on you to be honest… like, there is a gauge… each person has their individual boundaries... For example, if you're someone who your personal brand is also that you are a mum, and you don't feel comfortable sharing your kids, that's totally fine. Like, you don't need to be a mompreneur coach, or work with moms and like show your children if you don't want to… but you can speak about them. You can share your experiences as a mom and you can share like your stories without like, involving your family. And then some mompreneurs, they love bringing their family in, you know… so it really depends on the coach... And so that's how I really like to take my clients through this like... it's like this exercise where we gauge like, what's uncomfortable, what is leaning into the edge, and then what's like out of the boundary...

SAMIA: Right…

FARAH: Out of the comfort zone... And it's always good to like, know what your edges are.... 

SAMIA: Right.

FARAH: So yes, so if you're trying to, you know, share more of your life... I would, like just write out a piece of content lean into the edge… if it feels like way too edgy, right now, don't share it. Because there's always respect of trauma, of boundaries, you know… we as people, we’re... and coaches we go through so much to get to where we are… some of them... some of us I mean. And so, yeah, that's my big advice is like respect your boundaries, you can lean into edges, but that's how I would gauge like what to share... And then how do you merge your stories with your business? It's a big one... Because this is like… it comes through also practice and experience. And as you are, well... like one thing is coming to mind to share with you is… your clients want to know what is it that you live through that makes you an expert... So you can identify those parts in your story that you can take from that experience to show them that, "Okay, like I get you. I have been through these certain situations, which is why I really, really understand what you're going through, and I can help you get through it."

SAMIA: Yeah… 

FARAH: And another... I'm sorry, I'm like going on a tangent...

SAMIA: No, it's wonderful... Thank you, it's very helpful…

FARAH: Of course, one more thing that's come up is… even in present day, you can still share... like coaches have this idea that if you're a coach... I say you’re a happiness coach, right, Samia?

SAMIA: That's right…

FARAH: So if you haven't if you have a day where you're… you're a human being, maybe you're grappling difficult emotions on that day, like our... we're not always on a high or on an… on like a perfect, a perfect emotion all the time... And so you can actually share what it is that you're doing to move through that emotion. And it doesn't take away from the fact that you're a happiness coach. In fact, it enriches the fact that you know how to move through this problem. 

SAMIA: Yeah, yeah… it makes a lot of sense... And actually, what you were also saying earlier about the edges, you know, just to combine those two bits of advice… like in my experience, sometimes what I found is whatever I'm going through... sometimes I'm able to share in the moment, and be like, okay, I'm going through this, this how I'm dealing with it, and we're good… And other times, I really first need to get through it and get to a certain place of, okay, I have processed it, I'm feeling good again… and then I can share and be like, "Hey, this is what I went through." 

FARAH: Absolutely... it doesn't have to be like...

SAMIA: Yes... 

FARAH: Doesn't have to be like, in… when you're in the trauma, and you're like, you're like coming apart and you're sharing... because, you know, if that doesn't feel authentic to you, don't do it… Right… it's totally about again... it goes back to the boundary thing… Like respect... respect your boundaries, because that's the way social media will feel good.

SAMIA: Yeah... 

FARAH: Because everything has to be in balance. And it has to be respectful of each individual…

SAMIA: Yeah... That's an important point. I mean, my gosh, you made me think about so much in terms of... it can be such a learning curve as you were mentioning also when it comes to sharing your story... I know like for me, when someone would ask me... Why are you into this work? And I got that question a lot because when I told people, "I'm a Happiness Expert." A lot of people were like, we've never even heard of such a thing...

FARAH: Yeah... it's true...

SAMIA: …so how did you… yeah… and why did you get into it? So you know, for a long time... I mean, I knew why I got into it... But I wasn't confident about how much to share… exactly what you were like… what you were saying… because the real reason I got into it is because I'm a survivor of child sexual abuse... And so for decades, I was suffering with my own happiness. And when I learned to take control of my happiness, and, you know, learn to feel good, and you know, figure out that, you know, oh my gosh, this is something that I can be in control of… that we can learn to be in control of... I wanted to share that with everyone… But...

FARAH: ...yeah…

SAMIA: Yeah… the one challenge and sharing that with everyone was that I had not told my family about what had happened with me... And so for a while, I was like skirting around… and anytime I spoke publicly, I was like, okay, what can I share? What can I not share? Making up stuff…But not like false stuff… but just, you know, bringing out other aspects of… this is what has brought me to this point... But then, you know, eventually I got to a point where I was able to be honest with my family. And once that happened, then I felt... Ha, okay, now I can be publicly open as well. And so like for me, that was just like one of the...

FARAH: ...it's the journey. 

SAMIA: Yeah…

FARAH: Totally the journey… and as a personal brand, your brand goes through also the journey as you develop… as you feel more comfortable sharing and I can share from my experience as well... I had a similar experience in when I was first getting online... I had to gauge… because I had a difficult past as well... I'm, I started online after a divorce, after a really bad, traumatizing marriage in fact... And also, I'm also a… I had a really interesting childhood, I will say… I say “interesting” to make it lighter. But there was.. it was full of abuse… it was full of like verbal, emotional, you know, even sexual abuse... And so my past is riddled with trauma. And so for me to like, put myself online was really jarring. And I was like, "Okay, what am I going to share? Like, what can I share? What do I feel good sharing? And also to be respectful of… I wanted to be respectful of the people involved, you know? And as you, as you go on your journey, as yoFu start to build your brand, as you start to bring a community around you... that, you know, is like very, very respectful, very very nurturing... they're your people, they start to become your tribe… you start to feel more comfortable opening up to them because it's like you are friends in a way. And like, yeah… it was like that for me… it was such a beautiful thing... And so I… I actually… my main purpose to becoming a personal brand coach, is to allow people to experience the power of community. So I really, really… like I had... when I had no one, I had an online community. 

SAMIA: Yeah... 

FARAH: You know, and that was so beautiful for me...

SAMIA: Yes, oh my gosh… I must say, one of my favorite parts of being a coach and a healer is just, you know, the community of people around me... And it's… it really is so mutually beneficial… because it's not just me, “the expert”, you know, who's always teaching them or something like that... But really, with every person who gives me the privilege and the joy of working with them, I'm learning something… And also, you know, just like you said, that sense of support that you have, it's not just for the community members, it's there for me too. It's beautiful...

FARAH: Yes... yes, absolutely. I feel you on that. Yeah... And I find I feel the same… like every person that I have… It's such a privilege and honor to work with people, you know, like work with clients, who... because coaching is about a relationship, and maybe like, we're getting a little off track here, let me know, and we can come back... But I feel like coaching is very much about a relationship. And so is, you know, building a community... you're building relationships essentially on online, on your social media... So, coming, coming out as your true self and your authentic self is so important in that regard… not just someone who, like you said, shows up as just an expert… because that's very, like... it's great, right? Like you need information online… but there's also Google... I mean, that's what Google is for, to be, to be fair... So if we can just add a little more dimension to our social media and like, really make it more about, you know, connection and community, I think social media can be a much a much nicer place… and I feel like it's meant to be more for connection than anything else... 

SAMIA: Yeah.

FARAH: That's why ‘social’ is in there. 

SAMIA: Right.

FARAH: Right. 

SAMIA: Oh my gosh...

FARAH: Yeah...

SAMIA: Okay so thinking about connection and stories... and, you know, just... I was thinking about as you were sharing Farah… I was thinking about the healing power of stories because I know that one thing I've experienced, both before I started sharing my own story and after I started sharing my own story, is that when one person shares their story, especially the struggles part of it... it gives so many other people a sense of, oh, I'm not alone. And I too have the permission to be open and honest about the struggles that I'm going through... I know one of the things as a survivor of sexual abuse was… that was most difficult… was that for a long time... at that time I was growing up, you know, in India and Pakistan… and I heard zero conversation or dialogue… I didn't even see anything on TV... I was... in some ways, I was living a very protected life… And I heard zero conversation about the fact that child abuse, especially like sexual abuse exists... And so I thought I was the only one... And oh my gosh… and it wasn't until pretty much after I came to America, and I started to get exposed to survivors sharing their stories in different mediums, like on college... I mean, for me, the big change happened when I was on my college campus and suddenly started learning about all these different things… and including, you know, there's actually clubs on campus… or at least thank God, there was club on my campus... it’s called The Clothesline Project. And that's what they focus on… is create a safe space for survivors and allies, friends and families, to come together and share their stories… and use that as a way to educate about the trauma of abuse and so forth... And just hearing from other survivors, I was like, "Wow, I'm not alone!"

FARAH: And it was just so...

SAMIA: Yeah, yeah...

FARAH: And healing, like you said... And absolutely, I second everything you said. Like, it was, it's been so liberating, as well, might I say, to actually, like, when you're comfortable, of course, because boundaries, right... if it doesn't feel bad to you to share that, and you feel safe, it is very, very liberating, as well as someone else who can actually relate to you… like you have no idea since up... In fact, every time I open up just a little more, there's more people that come in to my network that who... you know, have seen somewhere I shared, and they're like, "I really relate to your story. And that is so powerful. And thank you for sharing”… And, you know, you can just be a source of inspiration for someone, which is, which is amazing. And the fact is that you… it's both a give and take...

SAMIA: Right. 

FARAH: Yes, it's equally, really fulfilling and liberating. And also to hear that you helped someone, maybe, and they were inspired by your story... that's also amazing.

SAMIA: Yeah. And if it can help them open up to you, as a coach or healer, about things that will allow you to help them more and better... my gosh...

FARAH: Yeah, yes…

SAMIA: That is so important as well.

FARAH: That is so important... And that's, I agree, that's like the big, big benefit in opening up and sharing your story and leaning into those edges, like I said… Because it's not always easy, but it's so like, yeah, we're meant to like as coaches, we're here to help... So,

SAMIA: Yeah… so for people who want to learn how to tell their story more, better, and get more comfortable in this practice... How can you help them?

FARAH: Okay, so you can also find me on Instagram... I don't know if you have a way of sharing my links...

SAMIA: Yeah, I'll drop any links that you want people to know about to get in touch with you... we will drop this in the show notes.

FARAH: Amazing. So there is a way of working with me. I do take on clients. I work with them one to one. And yeah, there's different levels of working with me... So just feel free to send me a message… even if you just have a question you know about social media image online, personal branding... I'd be so happy to just share any tips and value I have if even if you're not looking to work with someone yet, or you're not there.

SAMIA: Awesome. And I just wanna encourage all of our listeners to please make sure you check our show notes, check out Farah's links… Because I'll tell you whenever reasons I invited Farah to be a guest on our podcast was when I found her page... I found you first on Facebook... I immediately was so impressed by the clarity of your… you know, without even having to spend a lot of time on your page…. I immediately knew what you were about, how you helped people, you know… And so you had such a… like, I was like, here's a lady who is teaching about personal branding and she knows how to do it right...

FARAH: Oh, thank you. That is so nice of you. Thank you so much Samia... Yeah, I'm really glad we connected and you found me. And it's been, it's been really, really great speaking to you. And, yeah, we've connected like a few times. I’m really glad... Thank you so much for having me. And if we want to do… we talked as well about a part two… We will let, we will let you… you and your viewers decide if you want to part two. I'll be happy to come back and share more...

SAMIA: Awesome... we would be happy to have you come back. And so until then, I just wish you lots and lots of peace and joy... :)

FARAH: Thank you so much, same to you. :)